Comfort Under Stress

Why it matters

Presentations. Finals week. Tryouts. Asking the principal for a meeting. Stress shows up every time you try something that matters.

The goal isn't to never feel stressed. It's to get comfortable doing things while stressed. The student who can stand up at a school board meeting with shaky hands and still make their point is the one who gets the change.

A little stress can even help. In a 2014 study, Harvard researcher Alison Wood Brooks found that people who said "I am excited" before singing karaoke, giving a speech, or taking a math test did better than people who tried to calm down.

Talk about your ability to handle stress in your resume

Get more comfortable under stress

• Practice when it's low stakes. Raise your hand once per class. Volunteer to read aloud. Small doses build tolerance.

• Rehearse the scary thing. Say your pitch out loud to a mirror, a friend, or your dog before you say it to the principal.

• Shrink the first step. "Study for finals" is overwhelming. "Make a list of every test and do ten minutes of the first one" is not.

• Breathe out longer than you breathe in. Two quick inhales through your nose, then one long, slow exhale. A few rounds can take the edge off.

• Debrief afterward. Write down one thing that went better than you expected. Next time, you'll have proof you can do it.

Sometimes stress isn't a skill problem. If you're overwhelmed most days, that's a sign to take a break and talk to a counselor, get a therapist of your own, or push for better support.